SQUIDICULOUS!
A tiny squid, just one centimetre long, was the winning catch in the 5th annual All England Squid Championships fishing contest. The tiddler was the only thing caught all day. Stormy seas meant the squid couldn’t see the anglers’ lures – and 69 of the 70 fishermen came home empty-handed.
Davide Thambiturai (the 2011 winner with a 61cm squid) spotted the baby on his lure as he was getting ready to cast. Davide, 28, took a photo and measured the body – just 10mm – then threw it back and carried on fishing. But as no other squid was caught, the tiny creature – nicknamed ‘The Kraken’ – claimed first prize.
Competitors gave ironic cheers at the prize-giving as Davide, an ecologist from Portsmouth, collected a trophy and a new £120 fishing rod. “I feel humbled and honoured,” said Davide.
Contest sponsor George Cunningham said: “We expected 100 squid this year, sized between 40 and 60cm – but it wasn’t to be.”
Just goes to prove: great things sometimes come in small tiny packages …

HOT-LIPS
The record for having the least successful defrosting device of all time is held by an Englishman, Peter Rowlands, whose lips became frozen to the lock on his car door one wintery day while he was blowing warm air on it.
“I got down on my knees to breathe into the lock, “he explained. “But somehow my lips got stuck!”
While he was in that posture, an old lady passed and asked if he was all right. “Alra? Igmmlptk!” he replied, at which point she ran away. “I tried to tell her what happened,” said Rowlands, a pottery designer, “but it came out sort of … muffled.”
The unfortunate man remained trapped for 20 minutes until his constant hot breathing melted the ice and brought release. He has since been nicknamed ‘Hot-Lips’ …